Food, fun, and lots of fellowship

During Memorial Day weekend, Brad threw me a graduation party.

Ummm, I should clarify that a bit.

I told Brad that it would be fun to have some friends over to celebrate ME finishing graduate school. Then I gave him some possible dates and a guest list. He then sent out evites, and let me know who was coming.

Then I made a meal and grocery list. And I cleaned the whole house. And I prepped all the food and cooked it. Wait, Brad did grill the brats, burgers, and hot dogs...and he did clean our patio furniture and get the backyard set up. (I should give him some credit.)

It was such a fun evening! Because it was Memorial Day weekend, some of our friends were unable to come, but we had such a great time with

Adam and Christina

Melissa and Jeremy

and Megan.

We sat around on our deck, ate some great food, and chatted and laughed while all the kids played.

See!

It was such a nice evening! The night ended with a campfire, some yummy smores, and visits from two of our neighbors. And I even remembered to take at least one picture of me...since it was my graduation party!


I am overwhelmed again and again by God's goodness. His blessings are endless. Not only has He given us His salvation and His Word, He has taken care of all our needs. He provided the money for me to complete graduate school debt free. He gave not only me, but my husband and kids the extra time, energy, and strength to finish strong. He has brought some wonderful people into our lives that we truly cherish. He gave us the money and extra help (thanks Dad!) to build a deck so that we can entertain more people. Just in the last month, a friend gave us a great swing-set, which not only my children, but my friend's children can enjoy. We also have an insane amount of outdoor toys because my brother so generously gives us hand-me-downs from my nieces and nephew.

God is so good!

"(I) will celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness."
--Psalm 145:7

"How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you, which you bestow in the sight of men on those who take refuge in you."
--Psalm 31:19

Blogging about blogging

For the last day or so, I've really been pondering and wrestling with "the blogger world" and all that it encompasses...the blog frog, blogging networks and discussion groups, media advertisements, posts and comments, and the simple fact that 21 million women a week read blogs and 15 million more write their own blog.

And I'm one of them.

Two and a half years ago, I began this little blog because (1) my friend Gianna had one and I really LOVED reading it, especially since we didn't live in the same city anymore and (2) I really wanted a place to express myself, vent frustrations, process my thoughts about parenting, marriage, what God was doing in my own life, and keep a journal of the happenings of my family's life.

And I was very content with that. I knew there were a handful of people who read my blog, but blogging for the sake of blogging was my intent and goal.

Then, about three months ago, that all began to change. I had about five blogs that I followed, but then I began looking at other people's blogs that were linked to my friend's blogs. The first one being MckMama. I went to college with MckMama, and was drawn into her son's battle with SVT. I prayed daily for her while he was in the hospital, and was captivated by her beautiful photography, wonderfully spirited writing and her overall charm.

And so I added MckMama to my list of "blogs I follow" and continued on in my now slightly larger blogger world.

This brings me to about five days ago. This entire week, I have been completely sucked into the blogger world. I've joined MckMama's discussion group, spent countless hours reading COMPLETE STRANGER'S blogs, and have been fixated with reading other people's comments to, again, COMPLETE STRANGER'S blogs.

Seriously, I've been living in a virtual world.

So yesterday and today I have been pondering over (1) why I have been sucked in, (2) is all of this really legit, (3) are true relationships being built and is that the goal, and (4) are we all really just wanting, desiring, praying that someone, somewhere will read our blog and want to know us?

I have personally struggled with these questions.

Does it really, deep down inside, matter to me if I have 0 followers or 100 followers? Am I writing for the sake of writing or am I writing to give my audience something to read about? Even though I feel a sense of community with these women and LOVE the fact that I am NOT the only stay at home mother with struggles, issues, joys, sorrows, victories, and CRAZY days, can we truly know one another in the way God has called us to know and serve and love one another? Are we all publishing a version of our own "reality show"? How would I feel (and what would it do to my self-esteem) if I stopped blogging or if others stopped reading my blogs?

I love that blogs allow us to be vulnerable (like in Not Me, Monday) and be real and authentic with our daily struggles and lives, but just because I write about letting Caleb play with my only set of car keys while at a park with LOTS of sand just so that he'll be happy and content so I can chat with my girlfriends...which I let him do today and which WILL be discussed next Monday...doesn't necessarily mean my "followers" will keep me accountable, pray daily for me, and, at times, speak truth into my life.

My greatest fear is that instead of us helping one another realize we are all human and taking comfort in the fact that we all have struggles and sin, that we will begin to compare ourselves to one another. Case in point--I used to think I was "semi-healthy" until reading about MckMama's choice of foods and how I wished I could take pictures of my kids like countless other moms...who, by the way, are PROFESSIONAL PHOTOGRAPHERS) instead of focusing on how God has uniquely designed each one of us and rejoicing in that.

Yup, BIG struggle for me this week...

And I know for me, and many others, the source of life and hope and peace comes first from Jesus Christ, second from our husbands and family, third from our "real" friends and church community, and coming in at last on the list...our blogging community.

But, I know for me, it's easy to get sucked in.

And I DO NOT want this little hobby to take over my life or take the place of my Savior or my family or my obligations and responsibilities. And I DO NOT want another person's blog or life to cause me to feel shame or guilt as a mother.

I DO want my blog and others to make me smile, remind me that I am NOT alone, and give me great comfort and joy that the body of Christ encompasses every community, every city, and every country.

Make God receive ALL the praise!

Wordful Wednesday: A boy, a beauty and lots of bubbles.

Welcome to "Wordful Wednesday" created by Angie at Seven Clown Circus.


About a year ago, I used to DREAD bath time. Sammy, then, was about 2 1/2 and wanted ALL the bath toys for herself. And Caleb was about 1, and would not stay still to save his life! I would hear other moms talk about how much they enjoyed throwing the kids in the tub and letting them play. For me, it was a nightmare, and I usually INSISTED that Brad help me. (Neither one of us was really brave enough to do it on our own!) At the end of each bath, the bathroom was a mess, I had two unhappy children, and I usually was just as wet as them. But I have come to LOVE bath time.



See!


Caleb was blowing me bubble kisses!


I couldn't click the camera fast enough to get his bubble beard.


Now bubbles are my friend, and bath time is a blast for everyone.

Not me, Monday

It is time once again for my weekly confession, I mean, Not Me, Monday created by Mckmama.


While at a play date, I did NOT let Sammy play for an hour in a disgusting, gross, and who knows what disease it had in it...perhaps even the swine flu, bird bath so that I could sit down and talk with two girlfriends.

I did NOT put off my errands so that I had to go to Super Walmart at 5:00, the absolute WORST time to go!

I did NOT cry when I saw that Sammy cut her hair, and then proceed to tell EVERYONE that she was at home with her Father when it happened...as to not look like the incompetent parent.

Even though it was my husband's idea, I did NOT clean, cook, prepare, and get everything ready for MY graduation party. Oh wait, I think he did the grilling, but I did everything else!

And I certainly did NOT take a 3 1/2 hour nap (my first one in a few years) even though I had all of the cooking, cleaning, and preparing to do less than a day before my grad party...remember the one that I had to do everything for!

I especially did NOT have a very relaxing weekend with great friends and good food and spend some wonderful, quality time with my family.

Nope, NOT me!

Attitude adjustment

Over the last few weeks, I've really been convicted about my attitude. And, for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why. Grad school was over (and with it MUCH stress), many activities (MOPS, BSF, Youth Group, Sunday School) were done for the year, and it was summer in Minnesota!

Life really can't get any better, right?

But all I seemed to be thinking about was the four weeks Brad is going to be gone this summer on youth missions trips, summer camps, and miscellaneous other trips. I also couldn't stop thinking about all that had to be done around the house...deck and swing set stained, landscaping weeded, and countless organizing projects. Then there were many decisions that Brad and I hadn't yet made, but needed to, which were consuming a great deal of my thoughts and time. I was also struggling with what my role is now. I mean, for two years I was a "teacher" again. I was challenged and grown in remarkable ways. I was meeting with other teachers, wearing clothes OTHER than jeans and t-shirts, AND wearing make-up.

Who was I and what was I supposed to do now?

And then it hit me...one night a couple of weeks ago at Starbucks.

Since April, I have been meeting almost every Thursday night at Starbucks at 8:00 with two other friends to work through a Beth Moore study. Both my friends are fellow mothers and are women that I have REALLY, REALLY wanted to get to know.

Have you ever really wanted to be friends with the cool girls? Me too! Christina and Steph are very cool in my eyes, and I've really been drawn to them. They are amazingly strong women, and I respect them so much! Over the last couple of years, I've really wanted to get to know them better, and I feel very blessed that I was asked to be a part of this weekly study.

And I have learned SO MUCH from these women and this study! I feel we have been very authentic and vulnerable with one another, and I cannot tell how wonderful our time together is. It is truly a time that I yearn for every week.

A couple of weeks ago, I realized the root of my attitude problem. I had an ungrateful heart and a complaining spirit! It was like the scales had come off, and I could see my heart for what it truly was.

And it was because of one of these ladies.

I realized how desperately one of them yearned for some of the things I was taking for granted. She has to work part-time and is unable to be a part of a mother's group like MOPS or Bible Study Fellowship. Someone else has to be with her son while she works. She had a lot of student loans that were weighing her down.

I had NONE of these problems.

How dare I complain?

Regardless of where each of us are, there will always be someone better off or someone less fortunate. The key is to be content where God has us, and to be grateful for what He has given us.

I did not have a grateful heart. And it was causing me to have a grumbling and complaining attitude. I needed to make a change.

So the next day during my Sabbath time, I made a list of ALL that I have taken for granted. The list was crazy long! I was so blessed to have other mothers to hang out with and learn from at MOPS. I was able to be on a structured and incredibly in-depth Bible study like BSF. I had a WONDERFUL husband who supported me and helped carry the family/house load for 2 years. I was able to stay at home EVERY day with my kids instead of going to work. I had a great church family, and I was surrounded by wonderful, Christian people who loved me and loved my kids. And the list goes on and on...

What a change! Not only was I filled with gratitude for what I had, any current issues I had with contentment (about my house or size of my family or the clothes in my closet) faded away as well. I don't think anyone can NOT be changed when they stop to focus on what they DO have instead of what they DON'T.

God is the giver of ALL good things, and to be ungrateful really means I have a problem with how God is directing my life and providing for my needs. To complain against temporary life situations is to complain directly against God.

Ouch!

Above all, I really want to make these verses my daily prayer.

"Two things I ask of you, O LORD; do not refuse me before I die:

Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread.

Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you and say, 'Who is the LORD ?' Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God."

--Proverbs 30:7-9