A new creation

I am a firm believer that God is writing each of my kiddo's story.  Nothing that has happened to them since before they were born has been a result of chance.

I believe that He uses life changes, easy and difficult circumstances, and even decisions that Brad and I make to grow them into the people He wants them to be.  Everything shapes them...from how Brad and I parent them to how they are treated by other kids at school to what interests they have and even whether they are tall or short or can make a jump shot.

Even though I know this in my head, and hold tightly to verses such as Isaiah 40:11 to remind my mama's heart:

"He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young."

It's one thing to know it in my head, it's another to trust God with it in my heart and actually do it each day.

If you were to ask me last January what the hardest thing about our move from Minnesota to Iowa was, I would have said, "shepherding my kids, especially Sammy through the first several weeks of our transition."

I won't share all the details about her struggle here...I do believe it's her story to tell and not mine...but I will share a few of the joys that came as a result of those struggles.  

First, for the first time in her life, she decided, on her own, to read the Bible every day and in one year. Our senior pastor challenged everyone in our church to do the Bible Project on January 1, and Sammy immediately asked if we could download the app on our phones.  It was amazing to watch her as she discovered for herself the riches of the Word of God and how all 66 books fit together to show a beautiful story of God redeeming His children!

Second, we had a front row seat at watching a young girl, who had been told her entire life that God is good, and He is faithful, and He is sovereign, and that everything happens for our good and His glory...wrestle with and decide for herself if that was the truth or not. Brad and I could see daily her internal struggle with trying to reconcile between a good God and a God who seemed to have taken everything away from her.

And last, all of this led her to repent of her sins and call upon the name of Jesus to save her! 

On July 23, at our church's outdoor service...
 

 Sammy briefly shared her testimony...

 

(I love this picture of me holding Josiah, reveling in the goodness of God and His work in Sammy's life!)

...and was baptized!

We weren't sure at first whether Brad was going to find somewhere safe enough to baptize her...we weren't able to reserve the swimming beach area at Lake Ahquabi for our church service and where we were was more of a fishing area. But Sammy had her heart SET on being baptized in a lake.  A blow up pool at church just wasn't going to cut it for her.  She was a Minnesotan at heart, and she wasn't going to settle for any other place than a lake!

I LOVE this last picture!  I love the look on Brad's face and the joy on Sammy's!  

I'm grateful for Sammy's testimony of God's goodness, and that God saw fit....almost 12 years ago... to allow us to be her parents!

A time to reflect...part 2

What is the antidote to discouragement?

Change of circumstances?

Getting what you want?

More coffee? (This was a close runner-up! I DO love my coffee!)

No.

As I've been thinking and chewing on a few thoughts this past weekend about discouragement, I first landed on gratitude and the practice of being thankful.  I certainly had an overflowing, thankful heart as I was reflecting on pictures from this past summer, and they unquestionably encouraged me and lifted my spirit.

But there was something more...something more beyond the pictures and memories and the gift of friends and fun places and new adventures.

These people (my children and friends and family) are all gifts. The adventures and exploration are all gifts. Even the sadness and dissatisfaction and heartache are gifts.

But if my focus is solely on the gifts, I lose sight of the Giver of those good gifts.

Nothing that has happened this past year has been by my hand. God has ordained our move to Iowa, the sale of our house in Minneapolis, the purchase of our new home in Indianola, where our kids went to school (last year AND this year), the people we've come into contact with, and so many more things!

I may have been the "party planner" for my family this summer (you should have seen the enormous 4 month calendar I had on my wall chalked FULL of our fun summer plans...some of you have and can attest to this!) but God has been our Guide, our Light, our Good Shepherd.

He has been good. He has been faithful. His love has been constant.

And while His good gifts are very, very good...they are nothing next to knowing and savoring and being satisfied in Him.

Jesus is the antidote to discouragement.

His good gifts are just bonus.

And there may be seasons of fewer good gifts from God. When heartache and pain and despair are more prevalent than laughter and joy. 

In those times, I hope I will remember one of my favorite John Piper's quotes:

"God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them."

So, heart, press on.  Look deeply into the face of the Giver of all good gifts and know...

"that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith-that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge that you may be filled with all the fullness of God." --Ephesians 3:16-19

A time to reflect...part 1.

I am an extreme extrovert.  I yearn for time interacting with people. I like having a calendar filled with outings and adventures with family and friends.

But I also really love quiet times to reflect upon my life...times to celebrate the changes/growth I see in my kids and the house projects that have been completed....and also time to reflect on things I've been misprioritizing and look head on at the same sins that seem to creep back to the surface.

Reflection is healthy and needed for so many reasons, and I have realized that I haven't been doing as much reflection as I really need to do these last 6 months.

There's a sign that hangs outside a professor's office at Simpson College, where Sammy takes viola lessons.  My productive side loves it and embraces it fully.  My procrastinate side likes to ignore and disregard it.  The sign says:

"If it is important to you, you will find a way.  If not, you will find an excuse." 

Ouch!  I seem to be finding all sorts of time to do things that really don't rate as "truly important" in my life.  If quiet reflection is genuinely important to me,  I need to stop making excuses for why I haven't practiced it well.

Life has been full this spring and summer.  Full of really wonderful things!  But...as one thing finished, another one seemed to fill its place.  And so, many months have gone by without a lot of reflection, without a grateful heart for God's continued faithfulness or a pause to honor wonderful accomplishments or celebrations.

Last week I felt compelled to write some letters (actual, hand written letters...remember those?) to a few people that God has brought to my mind. In some of those letters, I included some photographs.

Photographs are a beautiful way to see a moment frozen in time. They remind us of wonderful times. Even of times that were difficult.  For me, as I looked through our 2017 photos recently, they reminded me of how far God has brought our family as we approach the one year mark of being in Indianola. Today is actually ONE YEAR that Brad began working at Grace E Free Church, and I feel compelled to give thanks for God's faithfulness.

So, even though I have lesson plans to finish for Sammy this week, meal planning to do, and a few mounds of clean laundry to fold, I find myself drawn to reflect and share God's work in our lives.

One thing I'm super thankful for is that I get to stay at home full time. I love being at home...learning more each day about how to run a household better, pouring into my older kids, and hanging out with this great, little guy each day.

And OH how my heart fills with joy when I think about the sweet friends God has provided for my kids at church and in our neighborhood.  When Hannah's birthday rolled around in April, she told me she didn't know who to invite because "all" of her friends were in Minnesota. We talked some more and we came up with a fun birthday celebration with her sweet friend from church.  Hannah said it was one of her best birthdays yet!

I'm so grateful for the friends God has given my kids.  These two next pictures may seem pretty normal and generic, but they make me want to cry every time I see them. 

Sammy would NEVER have survived this last year without her best friend, Maggie.  I am so, so, so thankful for Maggie and her family!




And this picture of Caleb playing basketball with some friends...this is what I prayed for him when we moved...a neighborhood filled with boys to shoot hoops with and ride around on bikes.  What a gift!

I'm thankful for Grace E Free! This was our Easter picture....aren't we cute?

And if you EVER visit Iowa, make sure to stop in Pella for the Tulip Festival.  We went there in early May, and it was worth the drive and worth the crowds.  The flowers were AMAZING, the town was very friendly, and OH MAN the bakeries and meat shops! The Dutch letters are delicious! 

Shortly after we visited Pella, my uncle Paul passed away.  Josiah and I drove to Bismarck so we could attend his funeral. It was a difficult time....my dad deeply loved his brother Paul, and I had such great respect for him.  I did get to see most of my dad's siblings and spouses, and that was a blessing.

My dad with his brothers Gerry and Mark and little sister, Agnes. 

A few of their spouses were able to be there as well.

Just three days after I got home, Brad and I loaded the kiddos into the van and headed back up to Bismarck to celebrate my 3 nieces' graduation.  It was a joy to celebrate with them...and oh how I love my Beth!!! 

When I look back at our June pictures, I remember all the house projects we got done....thanks Dan for lending a hand with our new shelves in our garage!

 


And the short, but very sweet weekend we had in early June when Beth and my parents drove down for Hannah's dance recital. 

Somebody was made to be a little dancer! 

Today, there is MUCH to be thankful for!  A full year of Brad's job at Grace...friends for my kids... much, much milder weather than Minnesota....and a few quiet minutes to reflect as Josiah plays quietly.

I feel like I've been in a bit of a slump the last several weeks, and I'm grateful for pictures that remind me of God's good gifts and a summer exploring a new place, making new friends and new memories.  There are still hard days when unmet expectations reek havoc with my emotions, but I'm getting better at looking closely at my emotions and aligning them with Scripture and with what I know to be true of God's character.

And for that reason, today I CHOOSE JOY!