Fighting for Joy

"For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you.'"  -Isaiah 41:13

It's been a very long last 6 months, and an even longer last 2 weeks.

Even though in my mind I've been grieving the end of our service at Lakewood Evangelical Free Church and our life in Brainerd for almost 2 years now, actually moving into our new home and neighborhood in Brooklyn Center is another thing.

It's like I'm going through the grieving process all over again, except this time with more tears.

The battle for joy and contentment over grief and sadness has been thoroughly waged in my mind these last several days.

And I have been clinging, literally clinging to God's promises...as I continue to greatly miss my dear friends and familiar places.

Yet today, as I sat in a quiet spot at our new, local library for Sabbath, life giving words watered my saddened soul.

Even though I have been so grateful for all God has done and provided for us as we began this journey of seminary last spring, I have been so focused on the amazing things He has done that I've lost the delight in Christ Himself.  As I've longed to give Him glory for the truly wonderful gifts He has bestowed, I haven't found my true contentment in Him.

My heart has been distracted by the clutter and boxes around me, the never ending house projects, and Brad's school and study schedule that I had allowed my circumstances to cloud my Savior's face.

Because of that, my heart has been sad and my joy has been gone.

John Piper, in his small book called, The Dangerous Duty of Delight wrote, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him."

I haven't been most satisfied in Him.  I haven't been satisfied in anything these last 14 days.

The Lord, in His kindness, led me to several places in Scripture today which renewed my spirit.

In Deuteronomy 31, as Moses prepared the Israelites for his departure and for their new leader, Joshua and new journey into the Promised Land, he said, "The LORD your God himself will cross over ahead of you," (v 3).  How comforting those words must have been!  And truly God himself has gone ahead of us preparing this way to Bethlehem Seminary!

Just a few lines down in verse 8, Moses says to Joshua, who was probably grieving the soon to be loss of his mentor and dear friend, "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."

And in Isaiah, where we see God's loving heart for His nation, I was in awe of these precious verses:

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." -Isaiah 41:10

And what will God do for his servant, then and today?  "I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them." -Isaiah 42:16

"But now, this is what the LORD says - he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel; 'Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.  When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." -Isaiah 43:1-3

My eyes then fell upon some dear verses that I had held onto in desperation over a year and a half ago.

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." 

 -Isaiah 43:18-19

I am so grateful for God's life-giving Word today!  And in my delight of my LORD and His Word, I do feel that I can have that joy and satisfaction.  He truly is sweeter than any of His generous gifts or anything else this world has to offer.