Sick Sammy

Sammy had her first real bout of sickness this weekend, and it radically changed how I love, care, and pray for her. I don't think I'll ever be the same again.

It all started on Friday afternoon when Sammy refused to take have a snack or a drink. I didn't think anything of it because she was going to eat supper in a couple of hours, and sometimes she didn't eat a snack if she had a large lunch. At 6:00, I put her in her high chair, and as I turned around to get her food ready, she threw up everywhere! Luckily most of it landed on her tray and her bib. I grabbed a huge towel, wrapped her up in it, and took her straight to the tub. Even though she had cried right before and right after vomiting, she seemed pretty happy in the tub. I got her cleaned up and held her until Brad got home so I could clean everything else up.

About an hour or so later, we checked her temp (which was normal) and gave her some much diluted apple juice. She threw that up about 5 minutes later. It was her bedtime, so after calling our parish nurse, I decided to put her to bed and give her 1/2 - 1 oz. of water every time she woke up throughout the night. (She had been waking up a couple of times a night the day or two before because she was cutting 3 teeth and had a little cold.) She woke up every 2-3 hours, and we gave her water each time and she managed to keep it down.

She slept most of the day on Saturday. She would wake up every 2-3 hours, and we'd give her water and some crackers and hold her, and within 30-45 minutes of waking up, she'd fall asleep in our arms and we'd put her back to bed. She didn't talk, play, walk, or really even move the ENTIRE day. It was a very long and (emotionally and physically) exhausting day for me.

By that evening, she had eaten a few crackers and some water and had kept everything down. She had wet (and soiled) diapers so I wasn't concerned about dehydration, but throughout the day, her temp had been on the rise and by 9:00 had risen to 103.3. I called our local nurse-line (by the end of the weekend I was on a first name basis with two of the nurses), and followed their advice. We gave Sammy some diluted Gatorade, unbundled her a little, and gave her some infant Tylenol. Throughout the night, her temp slowly came down, but then she started having diarrhea. I called the nurse-line again Sunday morning and continued to do what the nurse suggested. Sammy would still only drink a sip or two and eat 3-4 bites of applesauce or toast or crackers. She still didn't really move or whine or cry. She just seemed very, very exhausted.

The nurses told me that she probably had a G.I. tract infection and that it was following its course...vomiting, temperature, diarrhea...and so on. And I knew Sammy (and I) were lucky that she only threw up a couple of times and her fever only lasted around 12 hours, but that still didn't make me feel any better. I just wanted her to feel better and to chase her around the house. And it wasn't until Monday at noon that she began to eat more and walk a little around the house. Even today she's still not back to her old self.

Above are two pictures...one was taken a few days before she got sick...I just love her pig tails! The second one was taken on Saturday. That's exactly how she was for over 72 hours.

There were a lot of things that I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to handle as a mother (like labor, nursing, changing stinky diapers, cleaning up vomit, etc.). But somehow I made it through, and I learned a lot along the way. Like...

There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for Sammy.

Even though I say I put others first in my life, I really haven’t all the time…except for my child. Anything that I wanted to do for myself (or Brad or others) this past weekend was put on hold because Sammy was sick and she needed Mommy.

I really think the definition of selflessness is motherhood. Nothing has ever moved me like her tired, sick little face.

And, for a moment, I had the smallest, tiniest glimpse of how our Heavenly Father looks at us in our pain…with compassion, love, and open arms. And I know that I can trust Him to care for me, my family and friends, and my daughter.