Friday, July 06, 2007

The Waiting Game



It is now July 6, and Baby Boy Aust still has not arrived. I've been at our hospital or clinic three times already this week to either have a non-stress test to make sure the baby is still fine. (At my appointment on Monday we learned he has an irregular heartbeat--which will probably right itself after he's born, but I've been to the hospital twice to make sure he's not under any stress and is still active and okay.) Then yesterday morning I had my doctor (who CONVENIENTLY is now on vacation for a week) strip my membranes to see if we could get baby moving. I met with another doctor yesterday, who I also really liked, which I then learned will CONVENIENTLY be gone next week on a missions trip with his son. I just can’t seem to win!

Since I'm dilated to 3 and my cervix is pretty soft and my (water) bag is bulging, I'm a great candidate to be induced simply by breaking my water. (Yeah, no pitocin!) Brad and I considered doing that yesterday morning, but we decided to see if stripping my membranes would get things rolling and to give the baby a little more time to come on his own. I'm still 8 days away from my due date, so we still have some time.

As we were trying to decide to induce or not, the nurses and doctor were placing bets on what we were going to do. (Which I think is hysterical!) The nurses were pretty proud of themselves that they were right...most of them would want the baby to come on his own...but my doctor had no one else in labor that day and he was looking forward to delivering a baby.

I had so many mixed feelings on what to do. I really liked this doctor and felt really comfortable with him...some of the doctors on call this weekend I don't like as much. And I was a good candidate to induce. We had somewhere for Sammy to be Thursday and Friday. Yet something was holding me back. Maybe it was making the final decision on when he'd be born...picking his birthday...not allowing my body to do what God designed it to do...being induced early because of my fear of a large baby and then a c-section...not having a couple more days at home with Brad and Sammy. (Brad's first full vacation day at home was yesterday, and I was really looking forward to that.) I finally decided that it was a combination of fear and lack of trust...fear of having a doctor I had heard not as good of things about, lack of trust that God would take care of me and my baby, not trusting my body to do what it's designed to do, fear of the pain of contractions.

So we spent a wonderful 4th of July with good friends, let Sammy play in her pool, and got a couple of more things done off my list...and off my mind. Plus, Brad has had a couple of relaxing days after a very grueling June schedule. I'm still very big and very uncomfortable, but I've been able to relax and practice my breathing...which should be helpful later on! I have another appointment on Monday with yet another doctor, but I learned that the doctor that delivered Sammy (who had retired shortly after she was born) is filling in and on call on Tuesday. (He was REALLY, REALLY good, and performed para-cervical blocks instead of the traditional epidural...which I loved!) Plus he already knows my special circumstances. So I think we will ask for him to break my water on Tuesday if baby doesn't show up before then.

And now we wait. I’m excited, anxious, tired, and relaxed all in one. I feel content about what we decided to do, and I’m trusting God, my body, and the doctors and nurses. So all I can do is stay cool…and wait to meet my precious baby boy.

2 comments:

gianna said...

Caleb has a pretty cool birthday, too. 7/10/7--Fairly cool. You know what I realized when I hung up with you? When I was in high school, I loved the name Caleb John and it was on my top ten lists of names. cool!

Jenny Aust said...

Yeah, but I'm still a bit bummed that I picked his birthday for him instead of letting him come on his own. I do really love the name, and it fits him really well!