I have been overwhelmed by my "job" these last few weeks. It seems like it's harder and harder to keep up with my daily chores and weekly schedule. Most days I fall into bed exhausted either with feelings of regret over things I didn't get done or with feelings of anxiety thinking about all that needed to be done the next day or in the days to come.
This, my friends, is no way to live.
And while I do need to rethink my days, plan better, and get up earlier, what I need most is an overhaul in my heart.
I know we moms need to have a break. I know that we need help around the house or with the kids sometimes. We all need time to relax and get refreshed.
But motherhood is our job. A 24 hour job. A job we will (literally) have for the rest of our lives.
And it's a joy. A privilege. A blessing.
And one I often take for granted.
God has been moving quite a bit in my life lately...and merging all sorts of things together.
He's really cool that way.
I've been convicted over my sin of pride and my desire for comfort as I've been studying Isaiah at Bible Study Fellowship.
God has brought to mind some habitual sins that needed to be dealt with in Beth Moore's Breaking Free study.
And in One with a Shepherd, a book I'm reading with the other pastor's wives, I'm convicted by Mary Moffat, a pioneer missionary to South Africa, who, after wrestling with all she had given up at home to live halfway around the world serving in a mission station, said, "If I may be a hewer of wood and a drawer of water in the temple of my God, am I not still blessed and privileged?"
My daily work is hard. Actually, never ending.
But I should not be spending my days complaining about it. I should not be demanding some time away from my husband and children. I should not be throwing pity parties for myself in the company of other moms.
Everything I do is an act of worship to my King.
Every dish I wash...
shirt I fold...
cloth diaper I scrub...
poopy bottom I wipe...
time out or spanking I give...
spit up spot I clean...
song I sing...
kiss I give...
Memory game I play...
story I tell...
meal I cook...
tickle I give...
floor I sweep...
errand I run...
shoe I tie...
train track I build...
toy I put away...
child I tuck in at night...
Everything I do is an act of worship.
I know that what I do is not meaningless...well, except for alphabetizing my spice cabinet...which is certainly not important to some people but quite efficient nonetheless...
ahem...
God sees everything, and my work on behalf of my husband, family and home do not go unnoticed.
And, in light of all He has done for me...
I think it's quite reasonable.
3 comments:
AMEN Sister.
It's strange how we wish our lives away. Remember your college years & all the work, but also all the joys, fun, & memories? Well, think of that now in motherhood. Yes, Moms need a break & want to scream some days. Now I look back & miss alot of it. But I'm also looking at myself in my stage of life taking care of my Mom! I complain & scream sometimes, too. When she's gone will I miss her & remember all the good times? Yes! With God's help we all need to enjoy each stage of our lives!
Thanks for all your blogs, Jenny. They speak to ALL OF US! We're all human with feelings, emotions, hurts, wants, desires, hopes, dreams, disappointments & so on. You're excellent at putting your thoughts on paper/computer. It convicts all of us & also gives us joy!
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