My passion for date nights

Tonight, I watched 7 children for 3 1/2 hours.

By myself.

And...

I managed to make supper (from scratch), wash all the dishes, play with the children at various times, nurse a baby once, carry said baby around on my hip most of the night due to fussiness from teething...and complete almost 3 loads of laundry.

I'm terrible at math, but somehow: 1 mommy with 3 children + 4 extra children = more work accomplished around the house!

Maybe I just need to keep having children!

As we sat around the table, I realized there was an (almost) 1 year old...and a 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 8 year old eating dinner together.

Next time I need to invite a 7 year old as well!

It really was a blast. All the kids played really well together, and I was able to still get a bunch of my housework done. Brad was gone all evening, so it was a nice way to break up what would have been a long day.

I posted this..."just got done watching 7 children for 3 1/2 hours"...on Facebook tonight, and one of my friends called me "Super Mom."

I really, really am not...

trust me...

but...

I really, really, really am passionate about date nights.

There are many things that I have given up or lived without over the course of the last few years.

Favorite television shows, new clothes (since I seem to have many in a variety of sizes due to 3 pregnancies), privacy in the bathroom (Caleb, just WAIT til Mommy is done...please!), carpet with no spit-up stains, sleep....

But there are two things that I will not give up...two things that I are non-negotioables in my life. Two things I can't live without.

Weekly Sabbath and Date Nights.

Not only are these passions in my life, but I will do almost anything to help a friend or couple have these things as well.

Even watch 7 children for an evening.

Next to weekly Sabbath, there is nothing else I look forward to than my weekly date night with Brad.

I'm not quite sure exactly how our weekly date nights came to be or even how long we've been doing it. I think we began to realize the necessity of it during one of the marriage retreats we participated through our church. We also knew people who made it a priority every week and spent time talking with them about how they made it happen realistically. I also began to feel its need due to the weight of Brad being in full time ministry AND the responsibility I had of raising 3 small children AND the need to put our marriage first.

No matter how it came to be, we recognized the need for it. Once we recognized it, we began to plan. We added a category to our budget called "Marriage Enrichment." (That was Brad's idea!) We began to set aside money each month for date nights...like eating out, babysitting expenses, books on marriage, nights away from the kids, and even ballroom dancing lessons! We looked at our schedules and found a night (currently it's Tuesday night) that was open most weeks and put it as a re-occuring event on our calendar. We also tried to think of creative ways to make our budget go further...like babysitting swaps with friends or buy 1 get 1 free coupons for restaurants.

Even though we haven't always been great at this, we try to be wise about how we use those precious 2 - 3 hours each week. Sometimes we discuss what God has been teaching us during Sabbath or in our quiet time or in BSF or through a book we've been reading. We have also reviewed some of the material from past marriage retreats. At times we have spent time dreaming about our future or remembering the blessings from God.

A few weeks ago, while sipping (B1G1 free) coffee at a coffee shop just north of Baxter, we made a variety of lists. (Yes, Brad and I are that kind of people.) List of things that need to be done around the house...list of things to be done concerning Brad's job search...list of things that needed to be done within the next month...etc. Many times during the week we don't even have 10 minutes to do this! Talking about those tasks, prioritizing them, crossing some off, and making a plan to complete them is so freeing and actually makes us come together even more as a team.

During the last 2 weeks, we've been focusing on being more proactive with our parenting and have spent time talking about Sammy's weekly allowance and both Sammy's and Caleb's continued spiritual training (verse memorization, Bible reading and hymn singing). Yes, even last Tuesday you could have found us at Culvers eating (B1G1 free) ice cream while highlighting certain titles in our hymn book that we wanted to begin teaching them.

And because we have seen the benefits in our own lives, we try to encourage our friends to make it a priority as well. They don't have to do it just like us, but making time...even just once a month...to be together as a couple is so very important.

Important to nurture our love...important for our children to see us prioritizing our relationship with each other...important to keep common interests and sparks of love alive and growing...

So, I hope that the next time you see my status update..."DATE NIGHT!" on Facebook, you'll turn to your spouse and talk about when you can go on your next date.

And if you need a sitter, just let me know!

...I've been needing to catch up on laundry!